A Departure from Gym Memberships: Part Two

To pick up from where we left off, I haven’t paid for a gym membership since Justin Timberlake was just another singer in another boy band.  Why no gym for me?  Because gyms for the masses don’t offer what I need for my interests, my abilities, and my definition of a hard core workout.

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Without paying extra for the extras I want, I guess there’s plenty to do… plenty of mindless repetitions on the elliptical and step machines, for instance. Or rowing machines. Or Arc Trainers. Or, if the gym is really old – NordicTracks. Not my idea of fun.

I also don’t welcome the sights or the sounds: whether it’s that American Idol hopeful belting out the latest Lady Gaga on the treadmill next to mine (Honey, please…), the tiny four-inch square TV screens that line the treadmills, the huge dude grunting his way through benching 300 pounds (with bad form), or the sales staff who look like they’re bored to tears sitting in their offices each night. (Speaking of, why do gyms keep so many sales people onsite? Can’t they just outsource to a call center?)

Gyms also provide weight rooms that are crammed full of plenty of machines that work just one muscle at a time.  These weight machines don’t produce functional results because they don’t demand that your body stabilizes a joint to move the muscle – they do that for you.  They don’t take that joint through more than one plane of movement. Plus, they’re really boring. And, the etiquette in the weight room often leaves a lot to be desired. Don’t get me started on the guys who leave the 45-pound weight plates on the bars for me to put away.

Obviously, I’m not keen on the cardio equipment or the weights.  How about the classes? Sure there are also plenty of those, but my experience is that I must suffer through dozens of them before I find a good one. Let’s be honest, even after I weed out the great from the average instructors, the classes in most gyms rarely evolve in ways that keep my fitness level challenged and improving.  And the music matters, too.  Many instructors use “fitness music,” which is just knock-off versions of real songs.  Trust me, when it’s a Rihanna song and it’s not her singing it, I notice.

Maybe gyms work for the masses, but for me, the repetition, the scenery, and the monotony amount to one thing: Mass UNappeal.

Next up: a solution!

Stay hardcore,

Mariska

 

 

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Posted in Classes Navigation, Fuse Pilates

All Comments (3)

  1. Tori says:

    It’s a mass meat market.

    I’m tired of people throwing weights and grunting. If you have to grunt through it, you probably shouldn’t be doing it. These people are incredibly disruptive to the class I teach. And the guys who insist on punching the bags while a class is in session, is a whole other category in itself.

    As I look around the gym I teach at, I see horrible form. Some are about to hurt their backs and others are swinging their legs entirely too fast on a weight machine to be doing any sort of work. But what bothers me more, is to see a personal trainer give a client exercises that are not doing them any favors.

    And I’d say the front desk staff is pretty nasty.

  2. Heather says:

    YES! That generic music they use in classes…where does it come from? Is it a Disney mix of “Kidz Bop” or what? It seems like the twilight zone, except I am paying for it. Ready for a solution!!

  3. Allegra says:

    Let’s also not forget those individuals that go to the gym and move through their workout with a giant coffee or red bull attached to them the entire time. Don’t get me wrong. I love a good espresso – when I’m sitting at a cafe, savoring it. But, the idea of chugging a coffee in between weight lifting or running makes my body churn and all my potentially dehydrated cells, scream. Has no one ever told them that coffee dehydrates. Water. Water. Water. is the most delicious and effective!